all within mine eyes

The heat of passion
words said not meant
seeming uncaring, resentful
heart is empty and lost

desire bleeds from mine eyes
sight becomes clouded
bleary and confusing
searching the horizon

soul scours the land
seeking a similar
not finding a match
that missed piece of the puzzle

is this the direction of love
always looking but never finding
shall it find me
will I continue or cease

About Time

Dusk is over, darkness shrouds the land
my time is now
searching the shadows for the soul akin to mine

avoiding glances and comments
of the foolhardy and ignorant
silently despising them

I have the hate enough for many life times
and take more as each day passes
but I am not as bitter as I let on

I try to smile in the face of adversity
even laugh at it
like me or hate me

I am here
get used to it
cause I ain't going anywhere

deal with it or shut up
kick me while I am down
I'll get back up

try to keep me down now
kick me, stomp me
I will get back to my feet

I refuse to be a speck in reality
I make my stand
everything starts here

Acceptance

Lost and wondering
what is life
what good is it
when the shadows are all that comfort

being an outcast in society for all of my years
knowing the hate and cruelty
being the freak in the eyes of the beholder
not knowing compassion but from a few

is it worth it
staying in the hate
what good is it all
searching for redemption

finding it
then having it ripped away at the time of finality
left wondering
what did I do

where did I go wrong
why is it my life that goes this way
why do I stay and tolerate
yearning for acceptance

is this life worth it
shall I stay
that I must, I have endured worse
knowing the harshness of the hatred.

Metaphor is to life

The sun highlights the sky
an inferno of everlasting life
the clouds compliment it lazily

the sky the softest of blues
highlight the clouds
whether they be grey or white

Stormy skies entice and excite
telling of the storm to come
lightning strikes the night sky

Thunder breaks the silence of night
a soft rain beats down
the land soaked with the giver of life

Relaxing allowing sleep to settle in
eyes flutter, finally close
now the soft rhythmic breathing of slumber

Emotional Storms

The rage grows
anger almost seething
hatred grows hot

mind is not thinking
heart feels nothing
instinct only

eyes darkened
emotions cannot be seen
a blank look is all there is

how can this be
everything was so good
it is all gone

everything that mattered
all that there was
a heart that is empty

a mind that is full
always thinking
a soul that is yearning

where has the love gone
has it left this world
will it ever return

Untitled

The clouds blanket the sky
holding the blue and gold back
hiding it's beauty

Bringing it's own bleakness to view
the cool winds lick and nip
cold drops of rain try to fall

A delightful aroma floods the air
a new fresh smell that teases the senses
although the dark daylight is lovely on it's own

It compares not to the blue and gold
it lights the eyes and uplifts the spirit
bringing with it a feeling of contentment

the days come and go
much akin to the weather
a kind of magic

nature within all it's glory
beauty with the uncomely
a wonderful mystery

All Within the Mind

The constant pounding
pain ensuing
it hurts so much

the sickness dwells
is it me, or is it at all
within the mind or reality

is it sickness or love
hate or despair
possibly just sorrow

a life within nothingness
empty thoughts within a shattered life
dead eyes with a living soul

a dead soul with living eyes
that show little emotion
so empty almost hating

trust is it earned or given
who can you trust
if not yourself

Really Me ?

The door slams shut
darkness invades the heart
hate boils within

It all starts again
seeds begin to grow
through the orbs of black

blood runs cold
heart of stone
the old me again

tired of being what I am not
the smiles the gentleness
all for naught

being hate and one with it
my way, the only way
just a feeling an emotion

time will tell, can love heal
all I want is to know when
if at all, or is this really me

the hateful seething anger
it fills my heart and thoughts
I don't want this, but cannot escape

Untied

Staring into the eyes
orbs of pure darkness
seeing a reflection

deep within hides a gentle heart
lost and wandering in the soul
feeling trapped

this happens now and then
although something new awaits
a feeling of contentment

one not felt for so long
since a small child
it had been lost

a few good souls have redeemed mine
new friends and old
have found the key

unlocking the happiness
unleashing the laughter of my soul
cutting the restraints that bind

New Beginnings

New feelings arise
My heart feels renewed
a load lifted

belief that there is good
good people out there still
the world is not as bleak

once I thought it so
new friendships proved me wrong
explanations are not present

unneeded they are
life has changed for the better
things are just so good

this change in heart brings happiness
one I have not had
it's a nice feeling

to finally belong
being accepted
as a person, not just a face

Shades of Grey

Why is there so much hate
is it misunderstanding or fear
only to justify how you feel

why is there misunderstanding
might it be that discord helps keep peace
this is wrong

what if the world were gray
only shades of grey
would hate still exist

might it be that which makes hate possible
color in all it's forms
is it that which creates emotion

then again if there were no colors
would emotions exist
without it would the world we know be devoid of emotion

if color existed no more would there be prejudice
would it go away would love rule all
when everything is the same

no, it would not, nothing would change
things would remain the same
why?, everyone has opinions and beliefs that vary

to each their own
this is only a thought
see it as you will

Mirror Image

He is dark, average height
his long curly hair slightly tangled
his eyes something about his eyes

he wears casual clothes
not much for today's styles
just for comfort is all

he sit there quiet and shy
a loner always alone
rarely speaks,only if the mood strikes him

People see him than again they do not
he seems to float, he moves so quick
all without a sound

through the streets and alley ways
the rushing traffic sees only a shadow
not a person, never a face

but his eyes tell so much more
a sad soul crying out
looking for the tenderness only another soul can provide

scouring the dark uncaring world
just to find nothing and no one
his eyes blacken a little more

while the heart beats alone in the night
his mind still on the unknown
but those eyes I'll never forget

2 days 1 night

Sitting lookingat an empty page
wondering what to write
mind draws a blank

gibberish and hen scratches
is it all for naught
although it maybe something

the meaningless lines are winding down
filling the once empty page
is it a story or a poem

not that it matters, it works
to unblock the block
freeing the mind from it's trap

eyes strained from lack of sleep
body aches from the nights work
it's all over till the morrow

with the cycle of the everyday begins anew
the birth of a new mood
what will it be, which emotion

the sun shines brightly in the window
pull the covers tighter
let the weariness and groggy mind wake

the day goes as all have gone
sitting down comfy and content
the page once empty is now complete

Modern Romeo and Juliet

Two hearts shattered
lost and wandering
longing for completion

Can they put the pieces together
shall they find their way
can they pick up the shards of themselves

the story as it is
she was used and her heart broken
in jealousy for someone lost

his was one of despair
not knowing love
living in an uncaring world

unloved is he
in his eyes she is all
his life and redemption

she will complete his world
bringing light in
where no light is

they live in an opposite world
society hinders
their love is forfeit

life where this cannot be
where each sect keeping to their own
this will not be accepted

First Love

It starts deep down inside
Eats away at you night and day
but it can destroy you in a heartbeat

It is said your first
will always be remembered
It is as clear as the morning light

Even when you are with a new
you will never forget that one
that first experience

it can be at first
or it may take time
but when it is in your heart

You carry it forever
you will never lose it
as it will become a part of you

unforgettable beyond doubt
always and forever
but as you are

experience life
don't go straight for it
live life and cherish it

Who Indeed

Look what I have to deal with, liars
conspirators and fools
They seem to target me, Hate me

yet I can't get away
no matter what I do
I cannot get away

There are to many fools in my life
more than I alone can deal with
Who are my friends sometimes I don't know

Who can I trust
Who can I love for that matter
Who indeed can I trust

one day I will show them all
Who I am and what I can do
This is my vow

I will show them
all the fools and liars
just who I really am

Darkness

Shrouded within it
my covers, my obsession
passion within

black, unending
life in the lightless, it is my way
to live in the unending

my love for it forever, unknown

without fear I walk into it
as some fear it
I cannot, it is friend to me

I am accustomed to it
unlike others

My passion is shrouded
in darkness

No More Self Pity

They make fun of me
but some pity me
for what i do not know
i do not pity myself

I pity the ones who make fun of others
to make themselves feel better or to look good in front of others

but why?

Be proud of what you are, of who you are
and what you believe in

so i ask why make fun of others less fortunate
What if we the ones you mock made fun of your grades, clothes or hair

Now how does it feel?

To The Ones We Love

The hurt pulls
squeezes, penetrates
the strongest heart

Tears want to fall, but don't
no matter how much they want to
feelings overule judgement
try to apologize, but can't

The hurt is still there
still pulling, still tearing

But time heals all wounds, not for everyone
is it human nature,is it just emotion

It hurts so much
why not let go, can't let go

Love or infatuation
desire or need

Why won't the hurt stop
why can't it just end

This is how it feels
when you hurt the ones you love

Truth Realized

A life in sorrow
not wanting tomorrow
his hatred burning hot
his heart wished it not

For his road has been twisted and broken
his inner peace cannot be awoken
he feels the shame he should not
Shame for a man that hadn't thought
a shame that he shall carry and cannot parry

he had love but that was lost and to his father it was at no cost
he seems not to carry any guilt
the young man's world is on a tilt

his life has gone into a spiral that has put him in such a rile
the confusion has set in does the father even care about him

it doesn't seem to matter now, the Son has forgotten how
forgotten how to forgive and forget
the father will soon regret

Two Souls

Your eyes hold me
while your voice lifts me
standing with your arms about my shoulders
holding me close

While i was with you i felt a sense of freedom
free from the troubles of daily life

Your soul so gentle and loving
i wish i could be part of it
so i can feel the freedom of desire
and passion of what two souls can be together
when they join to be one

Only when it is emotional and spiritual
without the physicality is love worth it
without it it is meaningless

it is needed in seeking love
to find the other half of your soul to complete you
to make life whole

is it wrong or is it right
I don't know but it feels good
it feels right.

Why I Wonder ?

WHY I WONDER...IF I AM EVEN HERE


I have often pondered a question, Why are we here? But are we here or there or really anywhere? Can anyone answer this question, I really don't think they can. An age old question often pondered by anyone and everyone eventually, will think about this question. They will ask aloud to anyone who will listen, "Why are we here?, What are we, Do you know?, I would like to know". But does anyone know? Are they sure about what they think, I need to know for self-satisfaction not just so I can say "I know we are and what we are".

What indeed is the Question; are we a dream or are we real, think about that, can you see what i mean. Am I writing this? Are you reading this. how can we sayso? I question the reality of the paper i write on, even the pen i am writing with or not writing with, is the ink really there, is the pen in my hand. are you holding this paper or is it even really there?

Can you tell me if anything exists with confidence?

Wrongfull Love?

The tears stream down my face
as i watch her love another
hearing her say the words
i never loved you

they cut like a knife
the blood of my soul, soils my mind
but still i think of her
thinking she lied
still wanting to believe
yearning for truth

breaks my heart
being alone, so empty
the questions i may ask
all without the answers that i want

is love worth it
heartache and misery
for the one that does not care
if you love them or not